Urge

The urge to blog comes up at the most inopportune moments. Worst time is when the lights are out and am cozily wrapped up in my blanket. I think am at my scribing best at that time and totally loath the idea of changing status quo. Chances are rare when I have overcome my “Garfieldian” tendencies to open my lappy and start scribbling.
Presumably this situation is similar with many of us. Some I heard, have their brainwaves in the loo (man! What a place!!??!!) . I wonder what all are the other places/times when the bulb glows. (doesn’t that phrase immediately remind one of the scene when Jerry has a brainwave to tackle Tom? It does for me :-) )

So whenever or whatever, I hope the bulbs keep popping for you when required all through the coming year.

Yippie…. 2007 is coming soon.

Winters in Hyd

The onset of winter in these parts of the country is very different from those in northern part of the country. For that matter elsewhere in the world where temperatures dip very low during the day and snow covered landscapes are a regular feature.

All said and done, the winters here in Hyd are nice in their own way. A respite from the scorching summers that never seems to end. Mornings are lined with sun and a slight chill in the air that seems to play a hide – n – seek with ones mood. An instantly smile is obvious. What better way to start a day?

The slightest signs of chill in the air and folks around are out with their winter couture. Well, even we should get a chance to sport all those cardigans and jackets painfully collected to ward off the wintery blues. आखिर हमे हक्क नही है क्य। ? That kind of seems to be the attitude around here. Having stayed in a very cold place at one point of time, this attitude did seem to put me off. Did have a condescending look toward all those creatures who brought out the sweaters at the slightest provocation of cold. But then, times have changed, am soon to be a quarter centurian and more to say “Once a Hyderabadi, always a Hyderabadi”. Caring a damn about what the outsiders think, I have joined the bandwagon with utmost alacrity.

With the IT corporates abuzz, this laid back town is now running to keep up with the changing times. I am both happy and sad with this change. The city dresses itself to follow all the myriad festivals coming up and Christmas and New year being round the corner along with Id, winters in Hyd are very vibrant, in spite of the chill. What the heck!!! I get to wear my jackets ;-)

Teri Deewani...

बहुत कम लॉगॊ कॊ बेताहा चाहा है..
उन्की दीवानी हू मै…
यह आप्के लिए…

"preet ki lath mohe aaisi laagi
ho gayi main matwaali
bal bal jaaun apane piya ko
he main jaaun vaari vaari
mohe sudh budh naa rahi tan mann ki
yeh toh jaane duniya saari
bebas aur laachar phiru main
haari main dil haari - 2

tere naam se jee loon - 2
tere naam se marr jaaun - 2
teri jaan ke sadke mein kuchh aaisa kar jaaun
tune kya kar dala marr gayi main mitt gayi main
ho ri ha ri ho gayi main
teri deewani deewani- 2
tune kya kar dala marr gayi main mitt gayi main
ho ri ha ri ho gayi main
teri deewani deewani - 2

ishq junoon jab hadh se badh jaaye - 2
haste haste aashiq suli chadh jaaye
ishq ka jaadu sara chadha kara bole - 2
khoob laga lo pehre raste rab khole
yahi ishq di marzi hain
yahi rab di marzi hain
yahi ishq di marzi hain
yahi rab di marzi hain
tere bin jeena kaisa
ah khush kar thi hai
tune kya kar dala marr gayi main mitt gayi main
ho ri ha ri ho gayi main
teri deewani deewani - 4

oh ho oh hoohhhh...

he main rang rangeeli deewani - 2
ke main albeli main mastani
gaaun bajaaun sabko rijhaaun
he main dila zaram se begaani
ke main deewani main deewani
tere naam se jee loon tere naam se marr jaaun
tere jaan ke sadle mein kuchh aaisa kar jaaun
tune kya kar dala marr gayi main mitt gayi main
ho ri ha ri ho gayi main
teri deewani deewani
teri deewani deewani
teri deewani deewani
teri deewani deewani..."

-Kailash Kher
Album: Kailasa

A pleasure

Just when I thought the day will never end...
The last ounce of patience seems to be ebbing out...
The auto breaks down...
Water seems to be the most elusive thing ever available on the surface of the earth...
And the face wears an expression of a disgusting frown...irritated and depressed....

A child looks at you and suddenly waves with a divine smile.....

I was jolted to reality with that. A smile was then inevitable and suddenly the day didn't seem bad at all.

That scene of the child will remain one of my fondest memories - Keep smiling!

Fragrances

Earliest recollections of fragrances that linger are those of musk that my father used. One whiff and I knew he was around and that filled my heart with joy, most sublime and pure. These were the treats of childhood that one whiff even now take me back to those days. Dad’s perfumes are some of the best fragrances and can vouch for them any day. A rugged Brut or Denim or sophisticated Paco Rabanne and the Davidoff coolwater or anything that he uses brings an instant smile. Personally I have always liked the men’s perfume more than those for ladies. Somehow the florals put me off and find them too pungent for my taste.


There do exist a set of women’s perfume that I like and use them based on my mood or occasion. The very first ladies perfume that I liked was White Jovan Musk. I was suddenly thrilled to find something that was faint and yet had a sublime character that made it suddenly stand out. It was an instant hit with me and I took it to as fish takes to water.


The next I chanced upon was Hugo Boss. The men’s version is definitely good but the one for ladies ain’t bad either. Definitely top of the class and makes its mark instantly. Hugo is a tad much stronger than White Jovan Musk is but all the more sexier than the latter. There is a hint of mischief in it that appeals to my senses immensely. It is not fruity or floral. In a plane of its own, Hugo Boss for me is for special occasions and special people.


Davidoff Coolwater is also one of my favorites. As always the men’s version appeases me more than that for women. Thankfully the latter isn’t any let down either. I see it’s been pretty widely advertised these days. The beauty of Davidoff is the sophistication involved along with freshness. Hugo Boss is more sensual in an adventurous manner. And any day, Jovan Musk is far rarer than these but great for daily usage.


Coming to my latest finds, its Givenchy’s Organza. The first time I was asked to check it out, Hugo Boss had cast its effect. The second try was definitely worth it. The strongest aroma of all that I have ever liked, have realized that this one is an instant hit with many men. Partly floral and a tad fruity, Organza seems to represent a woman. I particularly like the bottle too and probably it is this image that also makes it particularly feminine.

Perfumes are very personal and they definitely represent a personality. Choosing the one that suits one the most is not easy, but once found it will always help one make a mark. Indulge in redolence!

Top Of The World

Such a feelin's comin' over me
There is wonder in 'most ev'ry thing I see
Not a cloud in the sky, got the sun in my eyes
And I won't be surprised if it's a dream

Everything I want the world to be
Is now comin' true especially for me
And the reason is clear, it's because you are here
You're the nearest thing to heaven that I've seen

I'm on the top of the world lookin' down on creation
And the only explanation I can find
Is the love that I've found ever since you've been around
Your love's put me at the top of the world

Somethin' in the wind has learned my name
And it's tellin' me that things are not the same
In the leaves on the trees and the touch of the breeze
There's a pleasin' sense of happiness for me

There is only one wish on my mind
When this day is through I hope that I will find
That tomorrow will be just the same for you and me
All I need will be mine if you are here

I'm on the top of the world lookin' down on creation
And the only explanation I can find
Is the love that I've found ever since you've been around
Your love's put me at the top of the world

I'm on the top of the world lookin' down on creation
And the only explanation I can find
Is the love that I've found ever since you've been around
Your love's put me at the top of the world

(Richard Carpenter/John Bettis)

Addiction or Indulgence?

My intro happened when I was in class six. The freezing temperatures were the compelling factors for this meet. I was not averse to the idea but then the enthusiasm was also not too high to try out something new. Mom insisted may be you could have biscuits and start to know more. The prospect didn’t seem bad and decided to taste for the very first time what tea was like.

From dipping biscuits to an all time anytime tea – a –holic, I am a self confessed tea freak who lives by the notion that there can never be anything better to drink than this. I mean in any circumstance a cup of tea is always gladly welcome. Lately, I was deprived of this at office cos of certain logistic constraints, in short I didn’t have a cup to drink from the dispenser. Ginger tea or a nice well made home tea tops the charts but then once you are soo addicted it seems imperative to have it in any which way. I don’t compromise much upon it though, coz I went all the searching for the best tea stall even during my Sing stay. My poor friends had to withstand my madness of having it from one particular place only irrespective of whatever the situation.

If there were some Things that I can never live without, I think tea tops it all. I can go all preachy about how it is good for general health and blah blah, but let me stop right here. Dedicating a post to it must have given you enough of an idea what a freak I am.
Well, if you also have such an addiction or rather indulgence do let me know. It’s always nice to know .

Cheers and happy Tindulgence!

PS: This post is also dedicated to one of my amazing tea companion with whom I have shared many a lovely conversations. :-)

LOST!

What happens when all your life support systems are shutdown??? Death!

That's how I feel... sans all that I valued most either taken away from me or distanced from me. My life's most important pillars are no more there for me the way they used to.

I will survive... but I do not know about the quality of it.

Confusions & Marriage

At 24, I assumed one generally tends to be in some state of clarity with regard to what’s wanted in life. Contrary to my assumption, I seem have no idea on anything that’s of any consequence. Status quo would have been just fine, but the sudden urgency that folks at home seem to have about my settling down – or in one word Marriage, is quite unsettling for my languid existence.

My sentiments are mirrored in all those twenty something Indian girls who are pursued by their parents to get married. The reasons given are “We want to see you happily married and settled” or “It is a great responsibility.” … “You are now twenty-…. It is the right time for you to be married” etc etc… the list is endless. In a way it seems alright. But then it is a question of my entire life and I really would want to take a well-thought out step and most importantly when I think I am ready for it. Within the garbs of freedom come the responsibilities. Quite an irony is what I think. Secondly, they don’t always seem to understand what is this thing called “chemistry” I keep yapping about. Immediately I hear that I should compromise. Agreed! Marriage in itself involves innumerable compromises, but then there is something that I believe in. My sis very neatly framed it, Do not comprise on the guy, compromise with the guy.

If I get married, I would want to be happy on my wedding day. Look forward for spending my life with this guy I totally adore. Be excited about it. But then, I’ll have to watch and see what destiny holds for me. The entire idea of marriage becomes such a big nuisance when you have worried parents and hyper excited relatives whose only aim is to see you married. Everywhere I go, the only thing people ask is when am I getting married. I am sure to tell them as soon as I find a guy, but then for heaven’s sake please allow me to find one. My married and committed friends also seem to have jumped the other side. They are equally vehement about it. Net result of all this is that I feel am thirty plus, very old and past an age where I can secure a ‘Suitable boy’.

All this does make me pretty indifferent…. But then, wish u all a happy and peaceful existence, irrespective of the fact whether you are single, hitched or married.

Swings

Sometimes its just tad depressing for no point whatsoever. Everything simply seems an absolute waste. A lack of enthu or anything that’s left of it. Wonder what causes this void. This complete feeling of being stranded in an abyss and nothing that I do seems to lift me from here.

Does this happen to all? Or am I one of those few souls who end up feeling absolutely lonely in spite of the fact I have everyone around.

I hate being morbid!

Health

One visit to the hospital and one realises how truly blessed we are. Going as a visitor may not make one realise but if one is going for some medication that's when it hits the hardest.

Life is very valuable and spending it cribbing or angry merely wastes its purpose. Tuesdays with Morrie.. a lovely book.. in that Morrie talks about the way Buddhist monks start their day. They assume a bird is sitting on their shoulder and ask if today is the day... and live it as their last.

A preachy blog... but then...Live life to the fullest and keep smiling :-)

Irony

Why does it have to happen to me time and again that when I want something/someone I do not get and once I decide to move on.... I get it!

Somehow.... I feel dead!

mann...

Ek choti si baat jo main kabhi kabhi bhool jaati hoon…. Abhi laga ki aisa kyu karti hoon…tabhi yeh panktiyan mujhe mili….

Mann ka ho to accha hai
par mann ka na ho to aur bhi accha hai
kyunki jab mann ka nahi hota
tab woh hota hai jo Uske mann mein hai
aur woh tumhare mann ke iccha se accha hota hai

Cellular Attachments

It is said that one should lead a life sans attachments or more so with detachable attachments in order to succeed and get what is wanted. I am not sure if I would be able to implement something like this completely but in a way would admit that am a callous person. A number of things that seem to really bother others don’t bother me. But then, there are these very small issues or objects that are very close to me. Primarily I would say because of the memories associated with them. Memories of something very nice and novel that changed my life in its own way that I can never forget. Associated with some of those people whom I have and will always love and respect, whether they stay in my life or move away from it.

After two years and nine months I have fallen madly in love. Something most unexpected and something that just simple carried me off my feet. I was more or less convinced that this change would never happen, but then life is what one can fashionably sum up as unexpected and weird. Bottomline for all this is, I finally changed my phone. I realize the above lines are highly overrated but then my attachment and sentiments with my first phone ( Nokia 8250) have been so strong that I simply found no reason to change it. Until yes, I found something that equally appeals to my personality. After undying loyalty and love for Nokia phones, not just me but my entire family vouching the same, I have hopelessly fallen for Samsung E900. Just less than a day old and I am in love with it already. There have been innumerable little memories with my old phone and with the new one I think its just the beginning of another long and lovely affair.

I realize this piece is how absolutely mundane and materialistic, but then in this fast paced era the phone seems absolutely inseparable. The best way to catch up with the people I love or miss is to give a call and hear them talk. Sometimes it just does not matter what they are talking but then it’s a pleasure to just know that they at least have the time to talk to you. Tell you about their days’ events and make you feel that being miles away you are still a part of their lives in some cellular way.

SIndulgence

My day begins with a promise to myself that I'll sleep again early during the day. Sadly that is fulfilled late in the night. It's always the case when I think I am going to sleep early tonite and end up really late. The weekends are usually dedicated towards absolute sloth. The one and only thing that lingers on my mind is that this weekend I am going to sleeeeeeppp. Ah! A wish that rarely comes true, coz as one should have it one can hardly sleep when one has all the time to do anything that one wishes. Sleep then, seems absolutely trivial. Can you believe that?? A paradox that I am trying to resolve since the time I took up this godforsaken job.

Anyways, let us return to the most pertinent point of my life... Sleep. My dad, like many, believes that 4-5 hours of deep sleep is sufficient for a person. I know, it sounds blasphemous to many (that includes me too). But, the fact remains its person dependant. Some need just about 4-5 hours and some even 9 hours. Unfortunately, for my poor dad who is a major workaholic and the types who can run for over two days without proper sleep, his daughters love spending time sleeping. Having been part of the supposed hi-tech world for some years now, I have also developed the notion that I can actually make up for the sleep lost over the weekdays during the weekends. Scientifically proven fact remains that this is not true and one cannot cache the sleep this way. But I suppose this is more psychological.

The whole of last week I have felt that I have been deprived of the most important thing in life and also have been working too hard. Secondly, this week I have spent majority of my time just sleeping. Strangely, no amount seems enough. The whole of Friday is spent on a single hope that one can rest rather crash over the weekend. But, somehow this Friday evening my sleep seems to have vanished the moment I stepped out of office. What do you think this is? Am I actually soporific or non-workaholic? Please don’t bother to answer because whatever the answer I cannot accept either of the options. Dukh hota hai yaar… sach ko aise jhel pana ;-)

All said and done.. this blog is for one of my fondest (sleepy) indulgence.

Days gone by...

Sometimes the days are so busy that it seems merely a couple of days and an entire week or fortnight has gone by. The busy schedules and the eternal rush to get to some place or the other has made me forget that June is coming to an end. Half of the year would be over!

Hmm.. so its definitely some time to stop and take a stock of the situation. This definitely reminds me of the famous Einstein quote –

“When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity.”

How the relativity factor brings in a different angle to every aspect. The days that seem to have flown past or the hours that dragged on like days. All in all a pretty interesting month so far. Managed to get another stamp on my passport and enjoyed my stay in KL. Experimented with my new cam and realized am relatively a mere novice and a long way to go to be considered a true amateur.

June brings back many fond memories and its been three years since I started working. I think its time I get back to my books now :-)

Rendezvous

Walking down levels and levels of shopping arcades it makes me wonder how much do people buy, whether they need that thing or not. There is a sale of handbags and shoes and I saw a sea of people there. Primarily women and some bored men towing behind. Occasionally some men did seem to be interested. Incidentally, I happened to end up at this sale and did pick up couple of bags. I was silently commenting on how exactly these people here buy stuff unnecessarily and there I go, totally gaga over three bags and end up buying two of them. I realize there would be many who wouldn’t understand this behaviour. Please believe me, neither do I quite fathom this fad. Nor the enthusiasm to shop that seems to subside but then tends to come back within half hour of being in the presence of some interesting articles.

Somehow managed to free myself from such worldly pleasures and spend some quality time – with myself. It is but rare when I get such moments when all I do is simply follow my mind without bothering about whose around and what would people with me want. A little niceties that seem to be dying in today’s times. Simple pleasures bring in maximum happiness. Licking an ice-cream while strolling over to the river side amidst peak traffic hour, is a feeling that I had quite forgotten. The supposed busy schedule and career seem to drown the basics of what I would call the pleasures of life.

A little philosophical, can’t help developing such a bent while sitting quietly at the river front. The awe-inspiring structures seem to quietly mellow down from the tough gray to the soothing lights of the evening. Lights dancing on the silent undulation. One of those rare days one gets to notice that in the equatorial region the natural light of the evening persists for a longer period than one realizes when stuck in office. There was just one thing that seemed a little amiss; I missed the nice hot strong cup of tea.

Muddat ke baat , kuch samay apne aap ke saath, bahut acha laga.

Random thoughts

There are times when I feel like entering a copy of every moment that goes past or rather observations that would make up something interesting to ponder. The feeling is overpowering. A greed to capture the most vivid or weirdest of incidents that fascinate me.

An interesting play of light on water or a lovely long ride to end of a country on a moon lit night, the moment seems just beyond words to capture. The harmony of the waves gently caressing the white sands or the expanse of azure stretching to the horizon. Some of the most stellar settings of the nature are so simply done, I am humbled.

Thrown in with an equally interesting and lively mix of company makes the experience cherish. The disparity in thought or the equanimity in action is also fun. Couldn’t help but notice that there should just be one chef per kitchen. The rest as followers makes things amiable. One place where I can surely say that team work is good but contributing ideas is a bad option.

What makes all this randomness complete is the music that seems to be inherent in all the elements that are a part of it.

Single... and ready to...mingle??

Alone!!! Staying all by myself in a far off land isn’t all that bad. Connected to the rest of the world with the best form of communication, am very content with my existence. Except that sometimes there is quite a depression that sets in during the night. The prospect of preparing one’s own dinner and eating the same, oh lord! What an agony! The reason you are still able to see this post is coz the primary contents of my victuals are a generous gesture from my aunt. In spite of such an act I still have to do the minimum, cook the rice. Believe me, it isn’t such a bad thing to do. Just that I have to clean all those vessels I utilize in my cooking and eating, immediately after I have my dinner, is what depresses me the most.

With a bout of overconfidence that I acquired in the last few days, in preparing rice in the most original style, I permitted myself to enjoy a small chat and let the rice overcook. Frankly, I cannot lie out here, so let me say I burnt some of it. Don’t worry, I still had a hearty dinner, but you can definitely imagine what an agony it was to clean the mess. This is one of the main reasons that deters me from cooking. The amount of cleaning that goes into the process kills the enthu in totality. One can ask, as to why bother about the neatness aspect and all, but the neatness freak in me cannot tolerate.

Burdened by my whims for neatness and torn for a nice home meal, I subject myself to such torture. I suppose finding a roomie might help me in humouring things a little. So long people… main aur mera kitchen… aksar yeh sochte hai… tum na hote to kaisa hote…

Single and not really ready to mingle... too much of a burden just for avoiding some cleaning.
Mama… am coming back to you ;-)

ELVIS

My introduction to Elvis was through my sis and thanks to her... now 'I can't help falling in love.... " with his voice. One of the best singers I have ever heard to. Even after all these years he surely ... LIVES... ELVIS!

One of my favourites here...

You were always on my mind

Maybe I didn't treat you
Quite as good as I should have
Maybe I didn't love you
Quite as often as I could have
Little things I should have said and done
I just never took the time

You were always on my mind
(You were always on my mind)
You were always on my mind


Maybe I didn't hold you
All those lonely, lonely times
And I guess I never told you
I'm so happy that you're mine
If I make you feel second best
Girl, I'm so sorry I was blind

You were always on my mind
(You were always on my mind)
You were always on my mind

Tell me, tell me that your sweet love hasn't died
Give me, give me one more chance
To keep you satisfied, satisfied

Little things I should have said and done
I just never took the time
You were always on my mind
(You are always on my mind)
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind


Maybe I didn't treat you
Quite as good as I should have
Maybe I didn't love you
Quite as often as I could have
Maybe I didn't hold you
All those lonely, lonely times
And I guess I never told you
I'm so happy that you're mine
Maybe I didn`t treat you…
Quite as good as I should have…

Vicissitudes

In a day, there are certain moments when you feel, "WOW!!! Everything is going my way" and then just about one small incident or word that alters your mood drastically. A sudden change in circumstances that sometimes bring reality crashing down onto you.

I wish I was as brave as Duke Senior, who says,

"Sweet are the uses of adversity,
Which, like the toad, ugly and venomous,
Wears yet a precious jewel in his head;
And this our life exempt from public haunt
Finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks,
Sermons in stones and good in every thing.
I would not change it."
--Act 2, Scene I- As you like it, William Shakespeare.

But then I try to sing it off by...

"Kabhi zindagi lage bhaari,
kabhi lagti halki-phulki.
Iske rang haske dekhe,
apnaa le khushi... har pal ki."

Singapore!

Am finally in Singapore! Didn’t quite expect that to happen so soon, but then no regrets either. Pretty much a feeling of home and a always a lingering feeling that India should also be like this at some point of time soon. The infrastructure here is amazing and its truly an experience.

Work pressures take away a lot of time but then the challenge lies in being part of both worlds. A number of new things out here and a lot of interesting stuff to do, the freedom here is what probably I enjoy more than anything. My exploration of this place has just begun and my future blogs might see a lot more of this.

An introduction to the Indian community here was definitely interesting. Predominantly dominated by the Tamil Indians, Tamil is one language that’s every where. The perennial misconceptions of most of these NRIs about India and its people and categorizing a nation on that basis, is something I don’t appreciate. But then I suppose it has always been like that.

Yes, one thing I have definitely done is visiting the famous ‘Mustafa’ shopping arcade. As I see it my trips have kind of just begun and there is lots of shopping ahead for me.

This pic happens to be from my room on the 12^th floor. I love the view!

Deadlines Amuse Me!

Well this was my motto, as a developer, things are cool. You are given such and such work to be completed by such and such time, you just do it. There always remains a yearning desire to be in the coveted position of a lead.

Progress to be a lead and deadlines are no more amusing! Why? Well, simply because doing a task is by far the easier thing to do than getting it done by someone. Struggle or search, whatever the means one can learn and complete a task. There exist varied elements that one comes across, while getting tasks done. Some dependable and some who are not. Now welcome to the third variety, who seemingly gives one, a very high perception of his/her capability but in the end churn up issues that definitely create a perception of standing in at the bottom of an abyss.

But then, all cribs being put up, I still love it when I am in charge. The satisfaction of seeing a good job done or rather let me put it, getting a good job done with such disparate elements is a matter of glee.

Hoping to bask in that situation… I now get back into my monitors role. Yes, deadlines kinda amuse me.

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

Chandler and Monica adopt twins and are now moving out in to a new house in the suburbs to start a new life. Phoebe is married found her guy. Rachel found a new job in Paris and is flying away. Ross, just realized that he is in love with Rachel and Joe now has the apartment to himself. That was the last episode of the Friends. The way in which Joe tried to reconcile Chandler’s moving out after the game board was broken and their uncomfy hug, that they silently conveyed. The way Phoebe raced Ross to the airports, to make sure he didn’t miss that one last chance to have Rachel back. Or the six keys being put back by each one of them were far too much to be put in words.

My Friends are such important and integral elements, for me they seem to be the fabric with which my life is woven. Each one representing various hues that make my life as good as it can ever be. This post is to all those special people in my life who have been there for me. Seen me through my little ups and downs and supported me all through.

At a juncture in life today, I hope and pray that they will always be a phone call away. For I am definitely going to be there for all of them, ALWAYS.

Thank you.

First Love

How often does it happen that one realises the beauty of a situation that they have been through only after, all of it is over and will never return? Am sure many times. The golden era of school days, the last few months in college and many such moments that one either wants to desperately hold on to or later in time cherishes them throughout life.

First love! Ah! For people who have experienced this can relate reliving that unforgettable period. Undeniably, being in love is always an experience worth reckoning, but the first time to have fallen in love is indeed different. It really takes a while before you realise that “I am in love!” . The various doubts plagued with it if you are seriously in one or is it just another bout of infatuation. Probably ranging of a higher order. As it mostly happens for many this realization dawns after a long time and the lucky few who do it in advance revel in it.

Why should this incident or phase be treated so special? Well, irrespective of the person you have fallen in love with (for all one knows he/she might be a complete jerk, that’s beyond point) it is the mere fact that it is for the very first time in your life that you have actually realised what it is to experience love from a partner. To be able to unconditionally love a person, who was a stranger few days/weeks/months back, is definitely a revelation to oneself. “I am capable of so much!” It is these feelings that can help a person evolve into a much better and lovable person.

There are some lucky ones who find their true love in the first person they fall in love with. Superb! As, I believe it is one of the purest forms of love and expression, absolutely guileless. But then, for the many others who aren’t that lucky/unlucky, chill people! You have had a great time, surely and upon choice, can now be a much better person.

Celebrate life!

Undulation

Always wondered what is so fascinating about water and the seas... my musings were answered with an experience absolutely fascinating and beyond words.

Waves softly hurtling the boat that monotony seemed desirable. A sense of absolute peace and happiness one would never want to let go of. A companion so close that one could relate to and feel the connection with the power that created them. The setting sun casting its reflection was a sight to be cherished. All in all an atmosphere that brought in a feeling to share it with some special people and also to remain alone. Never had I experienced such a dilemma and yet was in a position where I could afford both.

Nature has a way of showing how its dances are so similar to the vicissitudes of our lives. The rhythmic movement of the sea, windswept seemed like a spread of muslin stretching to the ends of the earth. The time had stopped and it was a moment to live in. Undulation that was just there for me, in life and for eternity.

Why did I stop blogging?

Can’t really say I stopped, but then somehow I got into this highly self-conscious thing about my writing and started analyzing stuff far too critically even before I put it on paper.
Crazy rt?? But how many of the times does it happen that we think about doing something and analyse and re-analyse it so much that eventually the novelty and the freshness of the effort is lost? A period where this happened far too many times with me. In fact had to force myself to pen down something just to keep my blog alive… or may be just breathing.

Do we call this a writer’s block? I wouldn’t fancy myself to be a seasoned one, but then all said and done I do write and hence can claim to be one :-). No wonder, all this while I missed something. I missed the freedom of expressing myself in the form I love the most. Unrestrained and unbridled in the world created by me for me and some others who would want to be a part of it.

So here I was going about noting all that I wanted to pen, at the most weird times and hours, trying to collage and compile and re-compile stuff. The end result I do not post anything. Agreed writing is an art, but I think I want to do it in my way. More spontaneous and more like me!

Welcome!

A very warm welcome to this New Year and with it the zillions of possibilities that exist with it!

A new year brings with it the myriad openings and ideas that one thought should have been implemented. It fills me with excitement to try and implement something I have never tried before. To try and make the best of this new year.

You might think that I am listing my resolutions.. naah!!! It's too much of an effort to keep up the resolutions made and hence I don't. I simply analyse the possibilities and go ahead living each day as never before.

Hoping that this year would bring in happiness and good health to all-- Happy New Year 2006!!!